


I Want To Tend You

by chronicAngel



Series: Wisteria [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, POV Second Person, Past Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-31 09:26:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10896459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chronicAngel/pseuds/chronicAngel
Summary: i wonder her traumas. her aches. her reasons for reacting to tenderness with rage. sweet wisteria, who conditioned you to respond so lovingly to temper.i want to tend you, and the only way i know is warmly.-Wisteria, Jamie Oliveira





	I Want To Tend You

You don't know why he loves you.

You don't know why when the two of you lay on his couch in pajamas watching one of his stupid movies, and you comment out loud on the fact that you think romantic comedies are unrealistic and terrible, and he retorts with the completely unrelated fact that you're a freak because you wear socks to bed, which you can't deny but can't bring yourself to be offended by. When he wraps his arms around you without squeezing until it hurts and you can't breathe, so warm, like a big cozy blanket, and you fall asleep cuddled against his chest with your nose buried in the old Batman t-shirt he wears which smells like black coffee.

You don't know why when you fall into bed next to each other and you grin at him and steal one of his sweaters before you fall asleep, and he doesn't even grumble, let alone yell at you or mock you or scold you to tell you that isn't funny because he needs that for work in the morning, he doesn't leave a bruise on your arm or your side or some place that no one will see it and instead lets you fall asleep in the warm wool of the shirt.

You don't know why when you have been dating for three months and he lets you move into his apartment even though you haven't yet found a job because you keep mentioning how insufferable Vriska is even if you don't mean to nag and you always feel bad for complaining to him about your roommate for multiple reasons.

You don't know why when he comes home from work, soaked from the surprise rainstorm that hadn't been in the weather that morning and grumbling about how he's never going out without an umbrella again but softening when he sees you crying on his couch because today is _his_ birthday. When he sits down next to you and wraps his arms around you and apologizes for being wet _so easily_ that you wonder if all boyfriends say sorry for stuff so small, if all boyfriends say the word so easily and not as if it is a last resort to make sure your girlfriend doesn't leave you after the last time you hit her-- your breath hitches and you say that you don't _care_ that he's soaked and you cuddle close to him because even despite his cold clothing he's so warm and so loving and you _don't get it._

You don't know why when you wake him up in the middle of the night with a scream before you throw your hands over your mouth, shaking and in a cold sweat that doesn't stop him from wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close and mumbling against your shoulder to ask you what's wrong. When he assures you that you aren't in that apartment anymore, that he won't let anyone hurt you, that you're safe now and he's here for you and he always will be and you believe him because you have known Karkat Vantas since you were in first grade and even when the two of you weren't a couple he was always trying to protect you, going as far as to confront Gamzee and nearly get himself killed when your injuries were particularly bad.

You don't know why when you fight for the first time, a real fight and not just an argument that you get over in a couple of minutes, and he doesn't raise a hand to you or scream irrelevant insults at you in the attempt to just hurt you. When after only a couple of hours, as you sit on the couch crying your eyes out and sobbing until you can't breathe, he apologizes and begs you to forgive him without acting like it's all your fault and he had no part in the argument. When he doesn't only apologize because he wants to have sex with you but instead cuddles you and makes you dinner and puts up with one of your crime shows even though he hates them.

You don't know why when he gets you a present for your birthday and doesn't break it after a dumb argument that never comes.

You don't know why when you have been dating for a year and he proposes to you, telling you that he's spent almost his whole life with you and he never wants to stop and you cry and it isn't because he's hurt you but because he has done perhaps the closest thing to the opposite; he has healed you. When you tell him yes without even registering the word leaving your mouth and he puts a ring with a red gem on your finger, explaining that it's Pyrope. When you grin and tell him you won't be.

You can't understand why he loves you.

But you're starting to.


End file.
